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Course Description Professors Benjamin Karney and Thomas Bradbury lecture on families and couples. This course examines relationships and their connection to individual psychopathology, marital discord, and family disruption. Lecture 17 – Course Conclusion: Families and CouplesWatch it on Academic Earth Related postsCourse Description Professors Benjamin Karney and Thomas Bradbury lecture on families and couples. This course examines relationships and their connection to individual psychopathology, marital discord, and family disruption. Lecture 16 – Intimacy Across the LifespanWatch it on Academic Earth Related postsCourse Description Professors Benjamin Karney and Thomas Bradbury lecture on families and couples. This course examines relationships and their connection to individual psychopathology, marital discord, and family disruption. Lecture 15 – Making Relationships BetterWatch it on Academic Earth Related postsSource: “Authentic Happiness,” Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D., Chapter 7 Bodily PleasuresPleasures are transient raw feelings that spring from sensory satisfactions along with positive emotional responses. These may be rudimentary sensations or the product of complex activities that require mental interpretations. Pleasures fade quickly when the stimulus is removed, and one may become habituated to them. Higher PleasuresHigher pleasures are likewise, raw, transient, and habituable. The distinction is that although sensual, they require rational cognitive processing to assign meaning. GratificationsGratifications are engaging activities that may be reflected upon with satisfaction. These activities are the products of our human strengths and virtues. Enhancing the PleasuresThe key to enhancing pleasure is to repeat sparingly, sample widely, and savor mindfully.
The GratificationsHappiness can be obtained from both pleasures and gratifications. [See top of article.] Pleasures are associated with “the pleasant life.” Gratifications are associated with “the good life.” Gratifications are available abundantly to even those disadvantaged who are deprived of many potential pleasures. – “What is the good life?” Aristotle The reader is recommended to Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Related postsSource: “Authentic Happiness,” Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D., Chapter 6 PermanencePermanence and is about time. Permanence reflects thinking in terms of “always” or “never.” Believing that the causes of bad events are permanent may cause one to give up too easily and give in to feelings of helplessness. Believing that the causes of good events are permanent contributes to optimism. PervasivenessPervasiveness is about space. Pervasiveness reflects the degree to which good or bad events affect unrelated aspects of life. Pervasiveness distinguishes between universal and specific explanations. HopeHope is associated with permanent and universal explanations of good events as well as temporary and specific explanations for misfortunes. Hopeful people recover from troubles more rapidly and are better able to sustain successes. Increasing optimism and hopeMost people never hesitate to accept negative self talk. To build optimism and hope one must recognize and then dispute pessimistic thoughts. Martin Seligman uses the ABCDE model of disputing pessimistic thoughts. A – Adversity is the event that stimulates negative self talk. B – Belief is the set of established assumptions that contribute to negativity. C – Consequences… D – Disputation… E – Energization… Learning to Argue with Yourself
Disputation recordDuring future adverse events, keep a record of your mental steps. Pay attention to your thoughts, consider alternative beliefs and meanings, observe possible consequences of various beliefs, and observe the energy of choosing alternatives to negativity. Related postsSource: “The Miracle of Mindfulness,” Thich Nhat Hanh Chapter 1: The Essential DisciplineThe essential discipline is to be undivided. While doing a thing, one should be fully attentive to that thing. Multi tasking undermines this essential discipline. The essential discipline consciously acknowledges and dismisses awareness of every thought and action. Chapter 2: The Miracle Is to Walk on Earth“Walking on earth” is to account each moment and event as a miracle, worthy of appreciation. It is founded on a calm heart and self control. Every breath, like every step, but should be taken mindfully. One’s breath resides on the boundary between voluntary and involuntary control. Learning breath control facilitates learning control of all other things, particularly the mind. Like breathing, meditation is not done in an occasional bit of time set aside; it should become a constant element of life. Chapter 3: A Day of MindfulnessIn learning perpetual mindfulness it may be helpful to set aside full days devoted entirely to practice. Live that day in a spirit of silence. Give each task you complete attention, slowly, with reverence, and without rushing or future anticipation. Chapter 4: The PebbleIt can be helpful, during seated meditation, to contemplate the image of a pebble thrown into a river. Associate yourself with at pebble. It sinks, moves, and rests patiently without effort. This practice is relaxation, a tranquil heart, and a clear mind. Instead of allowing our minds to be agitated without control, we become aware of our perceptions, feelings, and thoughts—and acknowledge them without judgment or distinction or disturbance. Chapter 5: One Is All, All Is One: The Five AggregatesWhile meditating, welcome the perception of unity, coherence, interdependence, and oneness of all things. Awareness of anything, whether external or even of mind itself, is simply mind. Whether we are conscious of body, physical forms, feelings, perceptions, or mental functioning, there is nothing but objects of the mind: consciousness itself. The entire universe can be perceived as present in every perceivable thing. There need be no divisions: all is one. We are fully interdependent with all. Our life and death are intrinsic to the same reality that all things perpetually ride. Accept that reality is as it is. Chapter 6: The Almond Tree in Your Front YardBuddhism identifies three types of reality: imagination, interdependence, and ultimate perfection. Yet, this introduces unnecessary and inappropriate distinctions and discriminations. Continuing meditation allows you to realize that subject and object are one. Any arbitrary object, such as an almond tree in your front yard, when contemplated, reveals an interrelatedness and unifying communion. Most people are afflicted with false views, which produce hatred, ignorance, and anger. All things, starting with yourself and others, should be viewed with a compassionate heart. Perfect compassion identifies with the nature and needs of all things. Mindfulness produces a state that is restful and content while still awake and alert. It serenely recognizes and accepts what is without judgment—everything is sacred. Further, the mindfulness of any sentient being supports and benefits all others. “When any great Master is born, the water in the rivers turns clearer and the plants grow greener.” Chapter 7: Three Wondrous AnswersKnow that the best time to do each thing is now; that the most important person is the one you’re with; the most important thing to do is to serve and make happy the person with you. Exercises in MindfulnessSmile serenely. Let go. Follow your breath. Be mindful in every time and in every activity. Learn the peace of non-doing. Contemplate interdependence, unity, and universal compassion. Seek detachment from dependence on specific outcomes. Seeing With the Eyes of CompassionEven under extreme provocation, we can develop and exercise control and compassion. Every moment is suitable for cultivation of mindfulness. Related postsCourse Description Professors Benjamin Karney and Thomas Bradbury lecture on families and couples. This course examines relationships and their connection to individual psychopathology, marital discord, and family disruption. Lecture 14 – Marital DisruptionWatch it on Academic Earth Related postsSource: “Pursuing Human Strengths” Martin Bolt, Chapter 8 Optimism and Psychological Well-beingOptimism is associated with a positive mood, a higher morale, and psychological health. Optimism helps us to resist distress from a wide range of sources. Optimism and Physical Well-beingOptimistic people feel better, are healthier, and live longer. They have stronger immune systems recover faster from trauma. Realistic OptimismRealistic optimism avoids wishful thinking while maintaining a positive future outlook. Unrealistic optimism underestimates risks and may discourage appropriate preventive actions such as using contraceptives or quitting smoking. Explanatory Styles and Coping StrategiesOptimists tend to explain problems in terms that are temporary, specific, and external, leading to initiatives to resolve the problem. Pessimists tend to explain problems in terms that are stable, global, and internal, creating a feeling of helplessness. Charles Holahan and Rudolph Moos identified three coping strategies: active-cognitive strategies affect thoughts, active-behavioral strategies modify situations, and avoidance strategies inhibit awareness. Psychology of HopeWe are intrinsically goal directed and readily imagine possibilities. Hope reflects both willpower and perceived ability (waypower). GoalsStrategies for goal setting include clearly establishing desired outcomes in all major areas of life. Bowls should be periodically reviewed, added, and deleted as necessary. Goals should be visualized as vividly in concretely as possible. Goal should be prioritized, with important ones receiving the most attention. Learning optimismReflecting on previous successes reaffirms our potential for future success. We must understand adversity, and create beliefs that have real consequences. Communal hopeHope and happiness usually exist within the context of a community. Social support networks increased hope in all manner of situations. Individualism can be damaging to hope. Hopeful goals are best when they seek to serve and benefit others. Related postsSource: “Authentic Happiness,” Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D., Chapter 5
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